Mercury Mad

Each little grain trapped in the concrete
is cool beneathe my feet
They cut down the tree where I
ran in the rain and
looked up at the street lamp
and cut off my hair

I used to keep it in bags
to remember my phases
thinking I might put it in art
but I couldn't decide if it was more
creepy or narcissistic to use a piece of myself
and from so long ago now

So I'll throw it in the fire on the beach
and the smell can compete with the
graffittied drain where we wade in
and let the minnows eat dead skin off our feet
anyway

We
Lean into the fear
even though the water is dark and unclear
because
There is no eventually
there is only now and again
and sometime last week

and he will never catch up to me
he will never see what I'm looking for
piercing my gaze through the nightly
amber cast
my heart already broke,
since I already know
I'll always get left alone

And one day I will just walk in the waves
merry and naked like always
and I'll just float away
Released from my body and sent into
bellies and eggs and algae.